15 minutes of inconvenience

Hi there.
Well after yesterdays post,
I went out and had a walk around the garden, i always do that, when I feel a bit blue.
Sometimes life has it's highs and lows, and sometimes you can take on too much.
I felt a bit like that yesterday.
 I am a person that finds it hard to leave things, I have to process it, and I have to do better.
It doesn't help that I'm in a new job, and I have to give myself a chance.
And that comes with trusting yourself you can do the job, no matter what others think of you.
I recently came across, something in my own life, that I have to leave behind.
And that fixing. people.
Not really fixing people, but I have to let them make their own way in the world.
It's not because I have 2 successful brothers, one in business banking looking after 600 clients.
And one in broadcasting and journalism,
And here I am, all wondering what on earth is going on in myself.
I don't like the unknown, I like having a plan, I need to set appointments, and I need to be early for them, I like goals.
So why am I typing this? on a wet dunedin day with wet hair?
Simply because i need to be real with myself.
I need to say as Dad, says ''Put your big grandma undies on and face it.''
I need to face a few things, because i am nearly 30, I am saving up for a new volkswagen beetle. ( yes it did win the ladies car of the year.) I don't have a boyfriend.
I'm perfecly happy with my lot in life.
There's a war between guilt and grace, but Grace wins everytime.
 When you're in that broken space, when things just don't go your way.
When you feel like you're falling short.
Give God 15 minutes of inconvenience and see what he does.
He will come through for you.
So perhaps you need to  just take hold of the promises of God.
Don't just keep poking in the dark, wishing that you were like others.
Because you don't know how many people you're blessing.
They might just be thinking the same about you.
And work is work, people aren't asking you to be superstars, they're not wanting you to be mary Poppins.
If you're struggling with just life.
Put on some big girls undies, and be bold, be with people that don't see your way.
It doesn't mean to be a door mat, it doens't mean that you've got a weakness.
If you see a problem you have to be bold and point it out.
So you can do anything, because God has equiped you to do his work.
you don't have to stay there, but just for the time, until something else comes up.
See it as a stepping stone, to something that you really want to do.
God always, works to your best ability.
And he was the one to put that desire in your heart, and when it's there, it won't go away.
The thing is, not hold onto the wrong things and muse over them, learn to let go, don't take everything to heart, yes it can be easy, just to throw in the towel, sometimes people expect that.
But encourage your heart to beat again, encourage yourself to pick up that skill and do it, because God hasn't given that skill to any other person.
If you want to go overseas and work in orphanages, go and do it, you don't need a badge or quailifaction, to do his will.
The more you life for him the more you see that he has a plan, and that plan, might seem a bit flakey at the moment, it might seem that it's a mountain without a summit.
But God is there the key is to keep climbing, dispite the uncomfortableness.

Chloe