Giving to be a blessing

 Hello there my friends.

How are you?

I hope that your having a really lovely, time with your family, especially at this time of year.

Today I want to share with you something that has been in on my heart.

Giving to be a blessing. 

What do I mean by that?

Well I'll give you an example, how many of us, buy something and keep it rather giving it away?

Andrei, is a giver, he has given me, so much love, and his attention, but not only that, his mothers rings, and now a new smart phone, well actually 2.

But he wants me to have all of it, and not think about the cost, and that is true giving.

And that is how Christ gave up his very self so that we can live.

What a sacrifice.

And the more I read the bible, the  I see Christ working in my own life, it's like an ebb and flow of the holy spirit.

The more we read the bible, we read the love of Christ for us.

Then I can pass that onto Andrei.

That only Jesus has given me, only for a time, on borrowed time.

We are all here on borrowed time, so we have to give even more.

That is what my heart desire is,   that I will give more.

So give to people who need it, who not only are the loved but the unlovable.

The people who need to be reached for Christ.

And that is my thoughts for today.

Chloe

My single years are coming to an end.

 Hello there,

So Andrei's visit was highly successful.
I am now engaged to him, I am looking forward to being his wife.
He is excited too, so we're planning our wedding, together, and honey moon for a week in lake district

He is looking forward to some quality time together,  we have prayed for each other, and love has won.

We are justing thinking about catering, and all the rest of it. It has been a whirl wind of a romance. but I have found a restuaunt that will do the food

It is my polytechnic, where I first became a chef, so they are doing the food.

I love Andrei so much, and I want to be there, for him each and every day.

His character in Christ, and always pointing towards him is what I love the most.

He is always praying for me, and always pointing me toward Christ, always there in the happy times, and the not so happy times.

Today I have prepared his  and his parents room, and bathroom. making sure everything is set, for his visit.

He is always close, and always a call away.

So I have 5 more days of work left, before the summer, and then I'll work some time, and then get married and then the move up to Wellington. to be forever with Andrei.

I'm looking forward to being with him ever so much.

My heart just swells to be with him. I love everything about him, his cycling, his sport, his dancing and seeing him dance.

which is amazing, he even taught me some of his swing dancing to sugar pie honey bunch.

he even made up some of slick moves to it.

Anyway, to those out there, who are waiting for their man, keep waiting and praying and believe Jesus that he will, bring you the complete joy, I have, found.

Never give up, in waiting, don't think, that it's too late, because it's not.

It's all about timing, Jesus will bring you a girl, or boy to you.

Andrei had to go after Jesus own heart, and grow in him.

I had to do the same, and I had to trust that Andrei will always be there, through all of it.

Lots of love my dears.

Chloe

Having resilience

 Hello my friends,
How are you?

I hope that you're having a really nice afternoon, there wherever you've found yourself.I want to talk to you about sticking at things when it gets tough.

Finding that traction, to be determined to keep going.

The question I want to ask you today, is, what keeps you on track to where you are going?

What keeps that motivation in your hearts to keep going?

My friend, let me share some light on the subject.

It's ok to be real.

And to talk openly about what's going on.

Because dear friends, if we just go around trying to keep it all boxed in, tied with a pretty bow, and we're just trying our best to keep it all nicely contained. and then all of sudden, the bottom falls out, and we're left to pick up the pieces.

Like with any relationship, it takes time to open up, and trust, to get not only people on their good days, but to see how they're going on their not to so good days. to keep checking in with them.

You don't need some fancy words, to say I care, but you just be there for them.

And let them talk, because you know there might be a time when they're not so great and they might need you.

and you will need each other.

And that is the most powerful thing about love is that it crosses the great divides, it breaks all boundries. and comes into your heart.

And it stays there for good.

One thing with love is it's not just a nice feeling, that we get, when we're in it, it's a commitment, to stay in it when it gets hard going.

Love stays, when everything else turns south.

No matter how many promises are make to ourselves, jesus is the only person who is going to make us stronger with it.

He is the ultimate teacher on the subject.

Jesus first loved us by laying down is life for us.

We are called to love, because he first loved us.

Sometimes I write about my sponsored children,  and it's time to write them a christmas card, now I'd be a pretty lazy sponsor, if I don't give them presents, wouldn't I?

I give money to tearfund, because I love what they are doing, they are giving through Christ, children with a hope and future.

And the lord has blessed me, as well with encreasing the things I have.

It says in the bible, that he puts the lonely in families.

And that is because he has given my the power of not giving up, but to praise God in the storms.

He has given me Andrei, a very special and dear friend.

so dears whatever your going through today, be encouraged of never giving up, because Jesus never gave up on you.

He hasn't walked away, turned back, told you see you later, walked out. rejected you. rather, he turns to your side, and equips you, to keep putting one step in front of the other.

And tells you to keep breathing, to keep walking, to keep going. and runs a million miles in the same direction as you.

because he loves you.

Lots of love 

Chloe

Playing the long game.

 Hello my dear friends.
How are you?

I want to encourage you today, to play the long game.

And what does that look like?

To me, it looks like staying in their for the long hall, to keep digging when everyone tells you to stop.

In my own journey, I have prayed to Jesus every day, in our therapy garden.

I call it that, because it offers me, a space to connect with God, on a more personal level.

Sometimes it's tough going, and we face trails every day. and not all of it is all that pretty.

But I want to point you to Christ, he will bring you through it.

He will give you the courage to stick in the game.

Paul writes to the church to keep running the race, the path that is marked out for us.

And to stay on it. it means not to look to the right or too the left, rather stay on course.

We read in 1st Thessalonians, chapter 3. Paul writes, that he sends Timothy to encourage the early church.

Now the word encourage is to build up, we read in Jeremiah that the temple of the lord was in ruins, for years, decades. with no one to rebuild the temple and city of the lord. Until Jeremiah rose to the challenge, working by day, fire by night. and sword in hand.

People we need to learn how to battle, for our Lord. to learn to be prayer warriors, for our lord, and to pray for those people. that are on our hearts to pray for.

And to stand shoulder to shoulder with them in prayer.

Why do we give up so easily? when we are so close to getting our prayers answered?

We simply loose sight of our break through.

I've had so many break throughs in my life, some I had to fight for, some I had to play the long game in.

But I want you to know to still be in the game, you know we all need those cheer leaders. beside us, cheering us on, when we feel like we're slipping.

So who are your cheer leaders that you have around you?

Or biblically speaking, who are your ''Timothy's?'' that the lord has sent to encourgage you?

We are not alone in this. we have the bible to stand on, and read, we have the armour of God to use, and protect us from the battles, and trust me, the battles things can turn sour pretty quickly.

If we don't know the word of the Lord to equip us in the battles.

So who are you relying on?

Are you relying on, yourself to be brave next time something happens?

or are you relying on the word of God, who will make you strong in the battles?

We can't turn back the clock, to what's happened in the past, the past if your a believer is dead, gone vanished without a trace.

We are a new creation, we are being made new every day of our lives.

So don't worry if your jobs seems mundane, or repeated over and over. Don't worry if battles come, because you stand on the word of God and he will equip you with his armour, to make you strong in them.

We need to play the long game, and when things come out of from left field, and throw us a curve ball?

We can take it in our stride.

My friends, do not hide, away in some dark corner of the room, rather come out in the brilliant light of the lord.

and let him set you free.

See we read in 1st Thessalonians 3:6.  But Timothy, has just now come to use from you and has brought good news about your faith and love, he as told us that you always have pleasent memeories of us that you long to see us, just as we also long to see you.''

This is an encouraging thought, that it is good to be connected to the people, of the church to meet reguarly.

So that the lords word will sharpen you up.

If we get out of the habbit of not meeting, or we are injured by the church, we stop going, making us liable for an attack.

It is also not good to have divisions in the church, or rumours starting, we need to be there for each other.

So how do we equip ourselves, in the word? to stand firmly on it every day.

That things in the flesh are going to come, temptations are going to come, no matter how much you read, and mediate on it, things will come your way. to test you out.

But stand firm on the lord, look to him, not to anyone else, because things will come at you, and if you're away chaising this that, the other, just for a thrill.

Who are you kidding?

Verse 8. of 1st Thessalonians. chapter, 3 says.

"For, now we really live, since you are standing firm in the lord."

That is really life in all it's fullness, we can trust no other than God.

To bring us through, if we are faithful in the small things, we are faithful in the big things. and he will encrease our blessings.

See we need to give out the love of Christ, to everything around us, and ebb and flow of his holy spirit.

Like a river.

We need to be refreshed in the word of God, so that we can in turn love others.

Rather than be a stagnant pond, of bittereness and conceit, and pride. 

Where nothing flows to or from.

It might be harsh, but you've been around people, who are always negative, they can't say anything nice, and they 99% of the time want some sort of sympahty.

Now I'm not saying all people are like this, think of yourself as a river, do you want to be a stagnant pond? we people can't enjoy you?

 Or do you want to be a river, with the ebb and flow of the holy spirit?

So that we can love people unconditonally, no matter where they are in life?

Jesus in the only way to life to live it to the full.

We need to be open to the idea of living life to the full, not to have a life with blinkers on, only wanting see when it suits us.

Or being in the right crowd when it suits us, loving God going to church when it suits us.

Or when we think we need to go.

Rather be in him the whole way through.

Jesus in with us all the way.

Personal growth.

Jesus loves us to grow.

Now at the moment, in my garden, I have weeds, a poisons plant called Oxalis.

it's quite pretty, flower, but deadly poisonis bulbs, you've got to get every bulb up without leaving a single root or bulb in the ground.

You can't just yank out the top, and leave the bottom to grow, because it will multiply and become even bigger than before.

 Planted in the right areas in the garden makes a nice ground cover, but not welcome where you have other things growing.

Like a tulip bed.

Don't let imposters in, to your carefully guarded heart.

Where Jesus has taken the time to grow you, into a beautiful being inside and out.

It says in the bible don't dip your feet into muddied water.

Don't do it, just to try it, keep your ways pure.

And you will be a beautiful garden, ready for the right person to come along.

And ask questions, because you won't know till you ask.

 Ask the hard questions, write them down for yourself, and get going on them.

Ask the lord he will guide you.

He will take you up that mountain, to where only you can be.

Non one else will do it.

Jesus is the only one.

Look to him always.

And that is my encouragement for today.

Chloe

 

Unconditonal love

 Hello my friends,
How are you?

I have been thinking a lot about you recently, and I'm wondering how you are.

The days are bright, and the weather is much settled, now that it's spring time.

And I'm on holiday. which is an added bonus.

Andrei comes this week, which is exciting for all of us. we're very much similar. 

I enjoy his good morning texts reminding me to cast all my cares onto Christ.

So I want to challenge you today, to see how you're going in that area?

Are you doing it in your own strength? or have you got the strength of God behind you?

I'll give you an illustration,  recently I got a retro fitted e bike, that is, that I paid the bike mechanic to change over my gears and put in an electric system.

Did I feel the call of God to do so?

Maybe, but I wanted to use my bike, for more than just a fun ride on a nice day, I wanted power, to get my up the hill.

Now for people who have stayed here, know that we live on a nice hill. and I wanted the power. so we went for the high end, range of power, to put on my bike, as I'm hoping to use my bike on Sundays when I start a bit later at the school, and get rid of my fat.

I have to go up 2 hills, to get to work, and I was done filling up my car with petrol, I wanted to change my ways a bit and retro fit my  bike into an e bike.

it takes 8 hours to charge from flat, which it is right now.

I wanted a life style change.

And sometimes we need to do that, we need to get the tug of God on our hearts and make the change.

My friend, are you making it work in your own strength? or do you have the power of Christ behind you, because dear firneds just like the power on my bike, when you have that power of God in you, you are free from making it on your own.

Jesus loves us unconditonaly, he loves you just the way he is, and he knows that we can't make it on our own.

Sometimes we need that transformation, in our lives, that make us from being Bla, to extraordinary.  to excellerate a bit in his love to propel us forward.

On my bike I have a throttle, that I can use to boost me forward even more, if I want to zip along faster, or if I'm with someone, and they are fast I can use my throttle, to boost me forward.

Sometimes it's like that isn't that we need to have a little boost, to propel foward.

Jesus is the only one who can do that.

Rely on him to take you forward. you'll find ways of connecting with people, that you havent' thought of, new friend ships to be made, rather than onto the new thing.

What I think, is the more you put on the love of Christ, the more you think about being like him.

The more you grow, rather being dwarfed by what's around you.

The more you allow yourself to grow in God's word, and hear what he's saying to you, the more you love him.

So let him be your guide today, as you watch out for ways to love others, unconditonally, beceause Christ first loved you.

Trust.

 Hello dear Friends.

How are you this morning?
I hope that you're good and happy.

I like to start my morning off with 2 plunger coffees.

That way you can be assured that I do speak sense.

I've been away to timaru, for a bit of a holiday, after finishing last term the holidays are a welcome oasis.

I was so tired last week, that when friday came it was wet, rainy, I ran the bath and hoped in. using some beautiful products that the school gave me on their gift table.

So I am appreciated there and a nice card to say thank you, for the terms work.

So after my friends 70th birthday, on saturday, I hoped in the car, and drove south.

Missing the snow that was falling in Dunedin, and southland.

Timaru means place of rest, and it's interesting because I really enjoy my time up there, staying with my friends Joy and David. and seeing my other church friends. and so on and so fourth and giving the cafes a good old nudge as well.

I think I counted that I had 8 coffees, and managed to sleep.

Today I woke up to Andrei texting me at half past 6 in the morning, wishing me a good day, he's jelous that I'm on holiday and he's not.

Well next week we'll meet for the first time, he asked me on the phone why I'm laughing. I said to him not many men ring me up.

which he laughed, and it's true, andrei is the only person who rings me up, on a nightly basis, we did try to have a break, but it failed.

We are just friends, at this stage. we like the same things, such a as bikes, currently waiting for my bike to become electric, should be finished soon.

Mum and Dad are holidaying in the north island, and Dad has given me instructions about how to work it, hoping that this bike won't just take off, since I've now retro fitted it to become electric.

Andrei thinks it's cool, and I do too.

Just hope that I can work it right.

However I want to talk about trust.

We know that we have trust in Jesus, that he is our prefector of our faith.

We hear it preached a lot of the time to trust in Jesus, but what does that look like?

 and when you're in the thick of it what does that still look like?

It means when storms come you way you can stand on the power of Jesus, and still know he's God.

I'll give you an illustration, there's a bit of beach, just out of Dunedin, and I love going there on my way north to Timaru., it's always changing. depeding on the weather. it can be still like glass, or it can be whipped up in the wind.

like yesterday, the wind was blowing off shore making the waves crash, and the tide was coming in, making it a spectacular sight.

The sun was out, and it was very pleasant seeing the water knowing I'm safe in my car.

I knew I was safe, and nothing could harm me, could I trust me car? no, but only put my trust in Jesus, he kept me safe in the car.

And it's times like those when things get bufferted around, you that you can be safe in the dwelling of his wings.

Do you see my point here?

Only Jesus can save, my dear friends, and point you back in the right direction.

As much as I love my friends, my family my best friends, Andrei, we can try to be there for them but we can't be saving them. The best we can do is suppor them in their needs, pray for them, be there for them, but it's Jesus who saves them.

We can stand on prayer, we can use the armour of God, to protect us not just put it on every day, and trust that it's doing it's work.

It is there to use.

Personally,I want you to be aware of the goodness of God, he will bring you through this storm, focus on him, when the winds come, just focous on him,

look straight at him, and you will not sink.

Don't just trust your things, and put trust in them. they will break.

As much as it's fun to have all the fun toys, and things like that, relationships will break, the shine off your toys will become dim.

The bible says not to put trust in earthly things but in your heavenly father.

Who made all things for you to enjoy.

Don't think for a moment, that you have to live a life like being dipped in lemon juice making you sour and bitter.

Jesus came so that we can live life and live it to the full.

So my friends, use your tallents that you have to build the kingdom of Jesus, if you're called to serve do it gladly, without complaining.

for it is your job.

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your heart.

Lots of love
Chloe

Singing in the storms.

 Hello dear friends.
I want to take this time to encourage you, today by singing in the storms.

Why do we go about singing when we're happy? Because we are simply that, Happy.

I found myself wondering why I am happy, all of sudden, I'm more productive around the home, and I'm making some good choices.

And Andrei, he comes down in 20 days, to stay. the great meet and greet.

You know when there's anticipation and your covering all basis? and suddenly night night means so much?

Andrei lives in wellington, and I live down here in dunedin, how we're going to work this out, It is up to the lords.

But I am silently planning a few things for Andrei, hope that he doesn't go back to wellington for a holiday.

Today he was out on his bike, and  got hit  a car.

Suddenly the lord came, and said to me to pray for safety for him.

And sometimes that's all that we're called to do is to pray into their lives, into our friends lives. and be there for them.
And love them for who they are, and what the mean in our lives.

And sometimes it means to just sit and wait on the lord, and at his feet.

And let him, just minister to you, and do a work in your lives and heart.

1st Corinthians. 13 talks about love, and what calls us to love.

The main things to learn is that hope keeps on hoping, faith increases, and love, but the greatest of these are love.

Love for each other means that your there for each other, through thick and thin. no matter what happens.

And when things get hard, keep on loving the people, they will come to you, and thank you for everything you've done for them.

It will come back to you in a good way.

Well I better let that do for now so matter what you're doing today if you're in the storms of life, or in the calm.

Praise Jesus the king of love.

Chloe

 

 

 

Praying for Jesus's grace

 Hello there my friends.
I hope that you're having a really nice morning. That is fulled with good things.

Today team I want to share with you, somethings, that I have been praying for.

I have been praying for you, that you will stand firm in the faith not looking to the right or to the left, but keeping on the path that Jesus has you on.

We live in a world that is filled with amazing things, but we also live in a fallen world, it is important to keep focused on him.

It's in those battles dear that our faith is made stronger.

I want to share with you the power of prayer, and the power of Christ living in us.

I have come out the other side, because my friends have been praying for me, but I also need to read the bible more. not to have entry points in for evil to come in.

I want you to turn to 1st Timothy, 1. 12 saying about Grace.

It is Pauls letter to Timothy, to encourage him.

And we all need encouragement. and when things become hard, it is important to see the signs.

I want to encourage you to, keep the faith, after suffering, there's always an after, in the trial, but we are made whole in Christ.

There comes a time in our lives, when we need to know friends are praying for us, and our prayers for our friends avail much.

The best is yet to come, my friends, never despair.

Don't think, for a moment you're too far gone. Jesus is there to pick you up.

We need to be wise in this day of age that we are praying and seeking the lord, not our own thoughts, or adding to what he's said.

It is very clear, in the bible about these things.

I want to  encourage you to read the bible to get wisdom, to seek Jesus in all that you do.

 

I want to share with you, the time when I had to rely on my friends prayers, to get me through some tough things.

I was at work, for the last 4 weeks, and a total sense of over whelmedness came, to the point I was seeing right in front me, mental walls.

I would hit this wall, and just  bounce back, I'd see it like a wall, like what a builder would build.  and each time I'd go about my work, I'd see this wall.

I'd hit it, and my energy would be sapped. I kept this quite to my self, wondering what would happen. it wasn't till I was prayed for, that that was a spiritual attack.

My friends were praying for me, and it wasn't till I was cut off from the ties that just like that the lord came and took the battle and won.

He is indeed mighty to save.

So my friends, if you're in the middle of attacks, or trials, or whatever your going through, uncertain times. Just look up to Christ is with you and on you he is grace is sufficient for you. 

That is my encouragement for you today.

Chloe

Stepping back and letting God move.

 Hello my friends,
How is your night and weekend going?

I hope that you're having a really nice night.

I want to share something that has been on my heart. sometimes that I hope that you will understand.

I've been talking to Mr A, for sometime now. and I have to say I really enjoy our friendship, it does have a distance thing. but I'm looking forward to his visit. when we can meet for the first time.

This morning I sent him a photo of my holding up a magnolia flower with the caption, ''Andrei, I'm your biggest fan.'' he liked it.

Which really isn't always about me, but I care about Mr A, very much.

I have to step back though and let God move, or else I do get clingy, and I'm not wanting to do that.

Stepping back and reading bible, and getting his map for your life, is crucial.

because without it, your like a blind person leading the other blind person, we need to be sharp, and sharpen each other in the word of God.

Because we all need to have a sharpen once in a while.

Andrei is a friend, but he's just there, if you know what I mean. He lives in Wellington, I'm in Dunedin. We talk every second night on the phone, he's coming down in a few weeks so we can see each others faces and meet in person.

Andrei is just a person who is special to me, I do find more happiness in my day, it's not all work and no play, rather work, Gym Andrei.

and our chats are very special.

its just a shame that we live in 2 different islands.

It is learning curve, and I'm willing to take whatever comes my way.

And letting Jesus do the work, and not pin so much on everything but to hold everything lightly.

Very lightly, so much so if God wanted it back he can take it back.

That's life isn't? it means dedication, but also it takes action on your part to pray for the person, and I do pray for Andrei every day.

And that is me and Andrei,and it makes me happy.
Well dears, I promised myself an early night, and about to have  have a shower and go to bed.

However I'm not finished yet, because I want to encourage you, because you know that the lord is good, to you and keep holding onto that hope.

He will supply your every need, he will, he has been faithful in the past, he is with you now.

Now in your your life, shining through the shafts.

Let me encourage you by keep digging into Jesus and he will give you the desires of your heart, and pray for your friends heart.

Don't listen, to the critical voices around you, keep on the positive side.Jesus is with you, right here and now dear friends he's with you in the early mornings, when you can't sleep he's with you in your waking hours, and he's loving to all he has made.

He hasn't turned away for a second, he's right with you. so maybe instead you're going ahead, and your wondering why things aren't working. perhaps take a step back and let God move in your life.

Lots of love
Chloe

 

 

 

Treating yourself to you time.

 Hello there dear friends.
I hope that you're having a really nice afternoon.

I want to share with you something that has been on my mind. and is giving yourself to some rest.

Have you allowed yourself, to unplug from your brain from the busyness, of the day to just be you?

To just rest and relax?

I want to share with you, because through my own life. I have had to take stock and learn somethings.

That when it seems out of control, and overwhelming, and trust me, that feeling that you get, isn't plesant, you can't even put on your shoes sometimes.

And you couldn't care less, and when other people are making those plans for you, you have to be intentional, and just zone in and out when you can.

I call it selective hearing, and it's quite good to know when to listen to things and when you should zone out.

When to be silent, and when to go for life.

As with any relationship you want to things to last, not to be disposable.

We aren't disposable, we are human beings.

Who are loved, and adored by Christ, but also our friends and family.

And sometimes we need to zone out and be in touch with our fun side.

For me it's the gym, and horses, and going on adventures with driving especially around beaches, sand, and writing.

So if you're in need of some time out, zone out and take that time to not see anyone, but also get in touch with your thoughts, your passion, what drives you.

Lots of love
Chloe

 

 

Talking up

 Hello my friends.

How are you?

I hope that you're having a really nice day.

I want to share with you something that has been on my mind, lately.

And that is talking up, and taking ownership about  what's going on for you.

I want to encourage you by doing this, because you will gain respect for yourself.

I was terrible, at doing this, because it is a weak point in my life, but as we all know, Mental health matters, it is how we see people, how we approach people and how we work.

I want to give you an example, of my own life. As things pop up from time time, and you can see a pattern.

I was at work, and someone said something, that was really out of place, and it was wrong, but I didn't feel at the time or my place to challenge him on it, so I left it, but like a festering splinter, it just festered away, causing hurt.

There was just me and this worker, and I was upset, and quiet, for a long time.I didn't laugh, I just focused in what was said. and prayed hard.

I talked it over with my friend, and he said to take it to management. I did, and they had a meeting with this person. and it was solved.

Now if I just let that go, and just prayed for him in fact that is what I was doing and nothing was done, how then could he know, that it was an issue?

I'm still like this today. Harassment of any kind is wrong.

And sometimes people see that as helping, but 99 % of the time it's not.

He was most sorry, that he caused what he did, and wanted to apologize to me, management didn't need to remind him, he knew what he did.
And that is the glory of grace.

Now my friends, if you do need to talk to people, get someone around you that will support you. don't pretend it's not happening, or it isn't.

Just talk to someone about it, because there are some wonderful people out there that will. that are looking out for you.

Talk about it, with someone you trust, and love.

And if you're that person ''trying to help'' you do it in love and trust.

Go gentle on people, treat them with care.

Treat everyone with love and trust.

And get things out in the open and solved quickly, this will help you move on, and onto new things.

I planted a new iris in my garden today, a black one. and I can't wait for it to flower, in the deep darkness of the earth.

I planted it to remind me, that I'm growing onto new things, and that I'm not that girl anymore, just to take it.

You will get out alive, dear ones, if you feel like everything is against you.

There are wonderful support out there just for you.

Just open up, like my iris that is in the ground, transplanted out of it's pot into the ground, to be free.

And that's my advice for you today.

Lots of love
Chloe

 

allow yourself to have patience.

 Hello my friends how are you today?

I hope that you're good.

Lately I've been going through my mental wellness plan, that I found when I was coming out of hospital.

It's amazing on how much progress you can make when you have the lord on your side carrying you through.

So today, I want to share about allowing yourself to have patience.

I hope that you hear me on this, because this is what I've been learning.

As I've been talking to Andrei, I've been learning a few things about myself.

We talk most nights, and it's just so nice to have someone to talk to.

He is coming down to meet me, next month, and there's so much to see and do in Dunedin.

I'm learning much about myself, I was impatient and I'm praying for patience.

I'm praying that I will be patient but also active in my waiting.

I don't want to smother Andrei, he is free to be himself.

I am learning to go at his pace, not like a trotting horse bolting on.

Love is after all patient, in waiting, and kind.

And love isn't always about yourself, it's about the other person.

The best thing about it, is that we're just friends, and we can talk about anything.

While I'm waiting for his visit, we can talk on the phone every day.

Jesus is the center of it all.

We just pray for each other.

So my encouragement today is allow yourself to rest in that patience, let it just relax you.

Lots of love
Chloe

allow yourself to rest

 Hello my friends, how's life?

I hope that you're having a really nice day.

Today I want, to share with you, to allow yourself to rest.

That it's ok, to have these times of rest.

What do we need rest from?

We are called to take the lords yoke, and allow him to give us rest.

it says in Matthew, 11:28. that he will give us rest.

and if we look at him, we will get that rest.

When Jesus moves, we move with him, he is not slow, in the way that we understanding slowness.

He's not a separate person, he is connected to us, we have his spirit in us.

And that same spirit is resting in us.

Now, since the spirit of God is moving in us, we need to open, up to the prophetic.

 to be listening to what he is saying to us.

And when we need to act, because he is calling us to act and not be on the benches, watching from the side lines.

When he is calling us to play the game for real.

Sometimes we need a break from life and that is good, we need to be refreshed in the word of God, and by others.

Mentally we need to take a break from the people that drain us, or use us  and put broundries up.

I'll give you an example, the lord came to me, and gave me a beautiful picture.

of it was a garden, now we have a beautiful garden here at home, one that offers therapy, to others.

but in it was a beautiful garden that he tendered to, and a fence, that was broken.

it was old, and needed work.

so here you had a beautiful garden, but a really old broken fence. and what he made beautiful, slowly died, and had no life in it.

And the fence still there, broken.

He told me, an interpretation, of this, was that, I had let everyone in, to care for this garden, and some people had broken the fence.

I had no boundaries. it wasn't till I asked my therapist, this.

and she said I have trust issues.

I was too trusting with some of my ''friends'' and they used me, and trampled my garden.

So my friends, if that's you, and you've let everyone in, without boundaries, and let everyone see you, and not kept your special thing for God.

He sees you a blameless, as that is the gift of his amazing grace.

So dear friends, if that's you today, and you're throwing caution to the wind. can I just tell you, to be careful of the fences, always have them in good repair.

Care about the small things, and they will grow into beautiful things.

Lots love
Chloe

 

Take it easy on yourself.

 Hello friends.

How are you?

I hope that you're having a really nice day.

I want to encourage you today, because we can all use some encouragement.

It's raining here in Dunedin, and I was rushing around with a full on head cold, that has no sign of giving up.

So  I came back home and had a chocolate muffin, and another cup of coffee. soon I will crash into bed.

The washing that is waiting to be folded can wait.

And sometimes things can wait, they don't need to be right now if you can't do them.

And sometimes we need to crash into that safe place, if we're just coping.

And sometimes we just need one small reason in life to make it easy for ourselves.

We can run around like a headless chicken trying to make things work, but until we really learn, that we're not called to do everything.

It doesn't give us the reason just to do a half job, by the way.

I'll give you an illustration.

And this happened recently in my work place, but I'm sharing it with you, so that you get the idea.

It was a normal day in the place everything was going to plan, before I left for the day, I said to the second person in charge, that the slices that was for the next day are in the fridge. so I felt comfortable, that things were to plan.

I was sick and was given the next 2 days, only to find, out that one slice was found, and they were raiding things for the boys,and gave them the items for afternoon tea early as their morning tea, and still didn't have enough.

Panic stations. and it set in.

Now like being on a bolting horse, uncontrollably it was hard to reign it all in.

it was too late.

This ship was sinking and it was sinking fast. now if they actually trusted me, and text ed me to find out where the second slice was, things would be fine, the boys would have enough.
Trust me if the boys aren't happy they start food fights. sometimes it's comedy.
I'm learning to trust myself, in my baking and my products.

But lately I've been stressed. I do miss the fun of the old chef, it was a fun place to be in the kitchen. and I found out that if I took his advice, for my dishes, at home they turned out really nice.

So open up like flower in the rain and take peoples advice. and stop running against the rain.

Sometimes we just need to stop and  take things in one at a time, and trust the lord, that he will give us the next stepping stone to move to.

No man is an island, and if you're left wondering why.

Here's why my friends, because he sets the lonely in families.

I came home tired from a normals day work, to check my emails, and here was a dear letter from my little girl Grace.
I haven't met little grace but I give money, to her so that the cycle of poverty is broken for her.

She had her birthday recently, so she's turned 5 years old, and off to school, and she wanted to say thank you for her presents.

It was so beautiful, that this girl has not only got provisons, to live well and happy, but she is kept safe against the virus, and now off to a safe school.

I know that one day she won't need my money, that my job will be done. But I clutch onto the thought, that Jesus loves her, and looks out for her.

My little Gracie.

So my friends if that's you at the moment, and you're left wondering, who, how and why.

Look for those posts in your life, those times that Jesus came for you, and carried you through things, to start the path of blessings.

He does turn lives around, and he won't start now, infact he's always working.

Mending everything, down to the small things, to the big things.

We need to trust him.

That's my encouragement for you today.

I better fold that washing and get dinner going.

Lots of love
Chloe

Cycling into the wind.

 Hello there family and friends.
Well it's another day, and we have sunshine, and clear skies.
A very warm welcome to see the sun, we haven't seen the sun for a while, for 3 days.

I've managed to catch the families colds, so I am home sick today, hoping that this headyness of the cold will pass. thanks to Andrei telling me to make some soup with salt in it.

I hope that this cold or whatever it is, goes fast. because I'm back at work tomorrow. then my 2 days off.
But I digress from, the point.

And that my title of the post, cycling into the wind,  and we all know if you are cyclist, that the wind changes, and when the wind changes direction and we are cycling, that it's harder to get traction.

Perhaps that is you my friend and you're feeling like you're cycling into the wind.

If you're feeling like that, or you now you are, seek help my friends. because it will snow ball.

Have outlets to do de stress, because if we let hem stew in our minds, we aren't moving on, we're just going back to the same old thing.

In my own life at the moment, I'm learning to trust, because my sycolist, said I have trust issues.

And I'll give you an illustration, a beautiful thing, happened when I was out riding the the day, now I know I talk about horses, a bit, ok alot. But horses like us have a past, you only need to read Black Beauty by Anna Swell to learn that.

But onto my illustration.

I want to talk about courage. This is what I have learnt, on the horse farm recently.

My friend who owns it, is like a saturary for horses.  has this 9 year old stable hand. who knows all about horses. so she came with me to catch my horse I am riding at the moment, because Wilson is lame. so this small girl came with me to catch my horse. so here she was, with this big horse, called Roo. he's a big boy, and they are good friends because Roo is inquisitive and likes to follow her around.

We caught Chantalle to ride, and Roo came close, and I thought help he's going to follow us through the gate. and get between this small girl and my horse.  so she said to me, to fix the gate, and she'll creep underneath the electric fence.

and that took Courage, on her part, to separate the horses.

She's this tiny girl, but she knew her strength with these horses.

This small girl was giving me insight,  of the horses.

This helps me with my trust issues. when we're trotting, on the lunge rope, I know someone has the other end of the rope, and when you look up, and go around in a circle, and go with the motions of the horses you are trusting your horses, and yourself.

I know I am off point, but I want to tell you, rather than at you, that when you're up against it, and you're up against the wind, Jesus is there gripping your hand, because he loves you, no matter what.

So the message here is just to keep cycling, keep going at it, because you will reach your desintation. and it will be well worth it.

That's my message for you today.

Lots of love
Chloe

Dreams

 Hello dear friends.

It's me.

How are you?

I hope that you're having a really nice day.

I've been at work today, feeding the students and doing dishes.

After last nights home group, I have a new appreciation of dish hands. Because half my morning is cleaning up after the boys and doing the dishes.

 We are all called, to serve, because we are all hands and feet of God.

Last night, at home group, we talked about holy communion and study on it.

It wasn't just the elements that we take but there's power in them.

It's not just bread and juice, but the body of Christ, that is why there's so much power in comunion.

The more we press into Jesus the more he gives us, Amen?

So what is he talking to you and me about?

That the more we look to the world in these things, the more, we get discouraged.

But we are called not to be , because we have hope in him.

Times will get harder, even today when I said I go to church on Sundays nights, I got some flack, from a new chef, just because I go to church.

It wasn't upsetting, but this is the world that we are in.

And that is why we shall strengthen us in taking communion, it strengthens us.

And dream, Jesus doesn't only give us dreams at night, but dreams of being fulfilled in life.

The more we pray, and press into God, the more fountains he opens up and fills us with his holy spirit.

Jesus isn't as far away as you think.

He is simply close to you, so close you know it's him talking to you.

right here and now.

Dreams are important to us, but we shall not praise the dreams we have, but we need to praise the lord that is in us.

Taking communion connects you to Lord, in home group the other night, we talked about how God remembers us, now there's a special greek word which I have forgotten, but it the word remember means, that he actually does something about it. The lord sees our cause.

He really sees it dear friends, and does something about it.

He sees your condition, and he does something about it.

The lord sees you as made whole, without blemish.

New.

We are all in this together and we are called to fight for the others, to take up our armor in the lord and fight for the people.

Last night in home group, we talked, about angels, now they are big, I've seen them, but they are there to minister, to act on our behalf of the father of Heaven.

Jesus is the one that has given us dreams, and he gives us the strength to carry them through.

If you think there's nothing there, there is.

Like my spring tulip bulbs that are up this year, they spent all year hibernating in the ground, not rotting, but getting geared up underneath the ground to come up.

and grow.

Team right now, you might think there's nothing there, but there is.

A beautiful time of resting, to gearing up for something bigger.

My friends it's time to call on those dreams that you have and put them into work.

Don't let them just lie wasted, in the dirt, but if we pray, and let God grow us, we will achieve so much more than we can do it in our own strength.

So dream big people, now is the time to enlarge your tent, make those tent pegs a bit bigger than you think

And Jesus will do the rest, just let Jesus grow you.

Those are my thoughts for today.

Chloe

It's all a learning curve

 Hello there my friends.

How are you?

I hope that you're having a really awesome week, and some things are working out for you.

I have had a good week, filled with lots of good things.
But also some sad things, as work has a reshuffle of jobs, and sadly some people have left work, to find other jobs.

So we've had 2 new chefs join the crew, and see how they get on in the kitchen.

The main focus here is, that we keep bringing our goals to the front line and keep up the work that we have started.

Today was a good day, my friend Sarah and I had a practice drive around town, got our coffee and dough nuts feeling like true Americans. And enjoying them in the gardens and by the beach. We then shot through to Port Charmbers, via the back roads.

I had a hospital appointment the other day, and we brought up the meaning of trust, which I find hard, I find it hard to do sometimes.

Especially if you have been rejected like I have. it's a hard thing trust, because you trust yourself every day with driving, working at your job. but yet some of us have this fear of trust. we put ourselves through so much, don't we so many bars are set to high, and we can't reach them.

The level of exception goes up, in ourselves and for others. the way we like to perform, to think we're bullet proof only to find out that we're not.

There's nothing wrong, in thinking this way, in our weakness, Jesus has made us strong.

You are a loved in the growing process, and it is a learning curve.

I have been like a closed up flower, afraid of the dark, for so long. it's only know I'm beginning to grow.

You know to grow  through things rather than having the perfectionist thinking that we can't make a single mistake, is not how we grow.

We can't grow if we're aiming for perfection all the time. 

We are called to put our best efforts in, and have it blessed by God.

It is he that brings the rain to make us grow, and if you're feeling a bit dry by it, pray into your job, your hobbies, your things that you enjoy. pray for God to bless them.

And he will.

We are all called by Jesus to pray and watch.

He loves it when we seek him, and he has favor on us.

 I was going to go out riding, my horse yesterday, but my instructor had to cancel the lesson, so I couldn't ride.

I was really disappointed, as I wanted to get back on my horse again, as it has been many a month since I rode.

But I will ride again this Friday. if I have no hospital appointments as I loathe the doctors ones with a passion so I try to keep up beat, and book in a lesson when I can.

One thing about learning about horseman ship and Me, is that the horses they take ques from you, you need to be confident, clear with instructions, and have to be kind on them.

And that is what I'm learning, about myself.

And that is what my encouragement for you today is.

Know your goals, know your game, and play it to your ability.

Lots of love
Chloe

.

 

Psalm 101 and my thoughts about it.

Hello there my friends.
I hope that you're having a really nice day.

It is clear in Dunedin, a beautiful still day. with no wind,which is a mercy.

I don't know about you, but sometimes we go through valleys and mountains in life. It is natural to do so.

So my question is, dear friends where are you at the moment?

Are you thinking everything is fine, and it is. Or are you feeling isolated and lonely?

Sometimes we can have heaps of friends and still be lonely, sometimes we can have a lot of friends and feel lonely. shall we go that deep?

Sometimes, we think we are fine by ourselves, that we don't need anyone to ''fix us'' or meet our needs.

This was me and the lord recently, I was just using him, and not having communication with him. just thanking him for all he's done.

But then he told me, that he's got some work to do in my life, that he's not a rescue blanket.
He's alive and living.

I was at church recently, and other people were getting vissions, and dreams, and I was just seeing sheets of rain come down, and watering the wells of people.

Then a light went on, and it was the fact that the more Jesus gives to the person who seeks him the more gifts he gives. so we need to spend time in his word, and not just rattle off prayers, and other things. that we want.

I was becoming quite selfish in this area.

I was climbing a mountain of self righteousness, and it was very lonely.

So what did I do? I asked the lord to open my eyes, to where he is working in my life.

I asked for some guidance along the way, that I didn't want to do this trek alone.
and be vulnerable for others.

So I've chosen Psalm 101, today for my bible study. Because this world needs hope.

It is riddeled with fear and lies, and we need shafts of hope to come and fill us up.
These are what the lord gave me, in the ''wells'' that have been stopped, we have been stopped, by people too long, to say it can't be done.

or that project is too big, or your a small person you can't be a person of influence.
but we can.

Let Psalm 101 be your map for your life, sing of God's goodness to you, let him hold you when you feel frail.
 when things are unknown let him tell you that things come at the right time.

Verse 2, Says, I will walk in my house, with a blameless life.

That could go for work too, be of good cheer and courage.

Not stir the pot and agree with the wrong things, but help each other out.
When we work as a team, we communicate as a team and you'll be much better in your job.

I was at a supermarket, and for me it was a job, it was money, I wanted to add a little girl to my sponsor family. and I didn't want to have another christmas, so while I was happy at the supermarket, I prayed for a better job.

I saw that the lord opened the door, and  left it open for me to try out at the school.
now I get holidays, and paid ones, and I can use my money to do other projects.

but I have to walk with a blameless life, because it will go well with you, if you keep communication open with the lord.
The lord will bless you.


Verse 6 says, ''My eyes will be on the faithful, in the land, and that they may dwell with me. He whose walk is blameless will minister to me.''


We also have a social duty.

If you see someone in need serve them.

I'm beginning to pray in tongues in the school. and I pray for the boys who will have my baking.

I also have social duty to my children who I sponsor, as one friend said her adoptive daughter, and I love that.

It is a really scary time for them, at the moment with Covid, they are in countries that aren't as well off  as us.

So they need relief parcels, as well.

If you have the money, please give to the people who give it to the children, make sure that 100% goes to the organization.

I am thinking of dear Grace, and Tallato, as they go about their day, I can't be there humanly, but I can be praying for them.

What I love about Tear-fund, is that they are thankful for the things, that you do as you sponsor or give donations.

Now if you can't that's fine, perhaps you find other ways in blessing people.


In conclusion, verse 8. it says ''Every morning, I will put to silence all the wicked, in the land.

Now sometimes we can't do that, but we can put to silence our wrong thinking.

Surround, yourself with good people, who uplift you, and bring out the good.

Not be friends with people who have no filters, and or be very wary of them.

 Keep your distance.

So keep up the good work.
You're doing well.

Those are my thoughts for today.

 

August thoughts.

Hello team.

I hope that you're having a really nice time.

Lately I've been thinking and praying, but mostly thinking about how I can change my attitude.  I am getting to the point I spin out.

And what makes me spin out, ever feel like something is out of your control?

What pushes your buttons to react the way you do?

Or the way I do, and that is something I check daily.

Today everything went to plan, I am sticking to a plan in my work place you have to, because without a plan everything goes out the window, pretty fast.

So now I have a plan, and I am liking it.
But I got home after seeing my brother, and I noticed that someone opened up a gift of chocolate, and was offering them around.
Now I was saving this gift for someone at work, and I got annoyed, I also said bout other gifted chocolate, and how that is probably eaten up.

Chocolate in any house, doesn't' last that long, but I was annoyed that someone had decided to open up some chocolate and offer it around.
No big problem. you just buy a replacement.

Problem fixed, in fact it wasn't a problem, the person didn't know that it was a gift.

Work is starting to ask more of me as well, and I don't want to offer my second best, I want to offer them my first best.
I'm also putting on weight, as well that makes me un-happy.

 I'm going to do the 45 day challenge at the gym and hopefully shift this fat.

I just want peace to come to this place, and just rest.

I am also learning that it's not all about myself, it's about other people.

and there's a lot to learn, about how to learn that in a respectful way.

And to trust and really understand.


Check the signs, because if we don't we can be like my car at the moment, with no break pads, and make a noise and do further damage.

If we don't check in with how everyone is going, how are we suposed to know, what the other person is thinking.

Like the chocolate, if I left in the pantry, for everyone to use, then it would be opened up, but if I put it in my room, then everyone will know it's for someone.

And not to think to much into things, if a person is busy, then they are busy, they will get back to you, in their time.

You know one thing that I want to do this spring is to go down to the tulip fields down south and take photos, of the tulip bulbs, and just be in the moment.

And see some friends, and not to be tied to things so much.

Sometimes we feel like we're living like a balloon on a string, and we come with strings attached. it's time to cut those strings and live.

And call things into faith.

What do I mean by that?

Well if you have a strong urge to do something, and there is a reason why, you should do it, then do it.
and do it with love and mercy.

In my job, I don't know the names of the boys I feed, but I pray over the food I'm preparing. and it goes well with me.
 This is not a boast, nor do I want a badge  for it or a medal.
But just being generally nice to children and everyone is a good way to be.

Don't agree with the latest thing that is going around.
Nor tear down people behind their backs, they will see your falseness.

But cling to goodness and righteousness, and it will go with with you.

Honesty and trust will give you more than just flattering lips.

It will go with with you. and things will go to plan.

Right down things that you want to do, and do them, and go for them with all you have.
And let you yes be yes and you no be no.

It's more than ok, to move on, it is healthy for us, and to take off the blinkers and start to live life.
And to be thankful, being thankful for things, and not just respect it. But being thankful to that person who did your meal or provided for you at that time in your life when you needed it.

And get around people who make a difference in the world, those are rare gems. pack them on the journey with you.
Lots of love
Chloe





 

Thinking out of the box.

Hello dear friends.

Well it's another new day. and with it brings a new day.
Full of good things.

I want to encourage you today, about our mind set.
Because it is so important, to keep a good healthy mind set.

We need to fill our minds with good things, because they will go into the soul.

There's a lot of stuff out there, at the moment and not of it is all true.

The only thing that is true and we can fully rely on is the word of God.

I am learning this, and learning to let go, and also learning that not all things, are all about me.

I need to take a step back, and let Jesus move more in my life.

This does not mean going religious cause I am over that, but building up in Jesus.
Because if we just go around not knowing in our minds, we are swayed by that news story, and the one that just came out 10 minutes ago.

We don't know ourselves.
 This isn't to make you condemned, or make you feel bad we need the strength of Jesus.

We often struggle with the truth, and what is the truth?
Of ourselves what are we to do?

We often have these issues come up, where we struggle in ourselves. and that is ok.

I had a hospital appointment, the other day, when we talked our my current medication. and what to do next.
Stay on the current one, or switch to a medication, that has good and bad things about it. Like all medication.

And if I go off the medication, will I always be mentally ill?

I might be, and that is what I have to come to grips with.

My life is happy, regardless, I am happy with my lot, even if I am up against somethings that are out of my control.

We need to think outside the box sometimes, and beat this thing.

That means, making the time to not just be living in a perficontist world. where everything has to be right, that there's no room for mistakes.

To be postivie in everything we do, because we can over come it.

We can over come our stuff we face, rather being labeled by things,  saying this is who we are, and that's our lot.

You might ask, what am I doing to over come this?

Well keeping a healthy mind, eating right is a way to bless the body.

Looking after yourself and watch out for triggers, that your mind will go back to. because it is a powerful thing.

Knowing how powerful? we can over come it.

Seeing yourself, as a success in everything, and that your the head and not the tail.

That people, don't need to know everything. and guard your heart, in everything you do. Don't allow yourself, to just open the gate for everyone.

Be on your guard, there are wolves in sheep clothing.

And let yourself, learn.

And don't give up, giving up allows everyone in.

And trust your friends, they will speak into your life. Possibly more so than family.

Watch out for warning signs, if you're not coping or spinning out like a washing machine on spin cycle, there's something wrong.

Go for a walk, ring a friend to talk things through, if you're struggling talk to your support person.

And be careful, about advice, people might mean well, but just pray, the lord will give you the way.

Be dead to the past, actively close the door to it. and DO NOT BE REMINDED OF IT.


Say this prayer.

Dear Lord,
I give you my life, I actively hand over my life to you.
Teach me your ways, and your love so that I can love others.
Teach me to forgive others, so I can let go and hold on to your forgiveness.
Lord I close the door to the past, I don't live there anymore, I am not that person anymore.
Lord will you help me live my life as you call me to live?
Free me of the things I can not change, I give you my life so I can change the way I think, act and talk.
Give me the power, to learn, to be wise,  and to just hold back on somethings, rather than spend my time worrying, because that achieves nothing.
It does not add a single minute to my day.
Lord I give you this thing I am struggling with,  ( Name it here) and I hand it over to you.
Be it sickness, be it health, be it trust.
Lord will you have these things, that come into my mind. Will you help me let them go and let you in.
In Jesus name
Amen.

Lossing it

Hi there team.
How's it going?

I am in awe of how God answers prayers.
We can be praying for a long time, for something to be answered.

I'm finding, out things for myself, that in th struggle you are loved, adored and cherished.

As my friend rang me from christchurch, and he's coming over to stay with us us this weekenend.
I love how he just calls me by my name, and he rings and cares. As we're planning out our time, together.  I have already asked him out for a meal.

I know what you're thinking you go girl, but this is acutally the first proper time someone is coming over to see me.

I'm trying to plan, but not too much. as he'll want to sleep and rest. as he is a care giver, and wakes up and picks people up off the floor, which he finds funny. he resured me, that he will sleep well. I feel bad that I have to work, but I hope that he'll understand, which he does.

He's also coming to the gym on friday, it's cardio.

He is so reassuring, that I'm trying not to smoother him. but he likes my organisation.

I facebook stalked him, our first time out together was barkers of Geraldine, trying out the different cordials.

I think about him all the time, holding him in prayers.

I have prayed very much, for someone so kind, and telling me to relax.
Relax what's that?

Take a step back sisters, it will be ok.

I worry when I haven't heard from him. All I have to say, is the night is so pretty and the lights on the water, and it's him calling me.

He's inland Canterbury, and I'm on the coast.

We are good friends, at the moment, I'm not ''claiming him'' he can see friends if he wishes to.
I would like to meet them.
And his family in India, and hear more about his life back home.
I find India really interesting.

Well dear friends, I better let that do.
My lovelies, if you're every wondering if you're prayers are going to be answered, they will be.
Just hold on and pray hard.
Lots of love
Chloe

Seasons.

Hello team.
Today I want to talk about seasons.

And about the times we are in.

It is important, to know what seasons we are in, because we do need to know.

And it says in psalm one, blessed the the person, who is planted by streams of water, that in season, sends out it's shoots.

It's important, to get things in perspective, because we can get all hung up about  one particular thing. and we over react to that.

And when we over react, we go from normal feelings to abnormal, in a very short amount of time.

I will give you an example, of what happened recently. where I was lonely, like all of sudden the tears came, and not even crying out to God helped.

I was so lonely, that everything in myself ached. I decided to ring my best friend and we talked about it, that we do go through these times, of lonelyness. you can be highly successful but still be lonely, even in marriage you can still be lonely.

So here I was crying out to God, asking him for something from a lonely heart.

I had simply had it, I was looking inwards not outwards, and missing everything that the lord has given me.

It was with that, a good friend invited me up to her place to stay a few nights, and just come away for a break, and I gladly went up, and met some nice friends, and her family.
 for 4 nights.

Now there's a lesson here my friends, don't think for a moment, things have passed you by. to me, right now, the time was right for a holiday.

And we shouldn't get bitter but a blessing to the people around us, giving them a word of blessing with whatever comes our way.

And we should always hold things very loosely, not so loose that things fall through the cracks, but hang onto the treasures that the Lord has given you.

The power of friendship, to be able to give rather than receive. and for a time God will call you to move in areas, where he wants you to go.

I have many times, not thought for myself, but now I'm thinking for myself.

Making my own choices, because too long I have been old I couldn't.

so now I'm tending my own garden heart, and tending to it, ever so carefully, not to allow anyone in just to use it.

And it's ok, dears, for this to happen, I was with a friend recently, and we were talking, about mistakes.

I have in my own family, thought I couldn't make not even one, though by doing that I have made plenty.

We place perfectionsim, on ourselves, that things have to be perfect all the time, to have people see the better side of us, not the ugly side. and to go through life, with scissors and chop out what we want.

I wanted that part of my parents, but not the other part. I grew insecure and angry, and confused for most of my life. because my parents were trying to do such a good job of protecting me, that everything was done, and therefore I couldn't make a mistake.

I was growing, but I wasn't growing in the way that was Godly, because I had a sense of self rightousouness going on. and a really big problem with it.
Because I was chopping and collaging what I wanted and what I didn't want.

I was a on a roller coaster, heading for disaster, along with the over reactions, about everything I did.

so I grew up very confused.

It wasn't until I was in hospital, for 14 days, the lord came, and said ''Chloe can I carry you on my shoulders?" and I was humanly picked up, and placed on his shoulders, and carried, and we faced things, together.

Time and time again, the Lord has come through for me, times when I just needed to picked up and understood, times when all the confusion just melted away, that I really did know him.

I didn't need to prove anything to anyone, I was simply loved by Jesus.

And that is my encouragement for you today is, no matter what season you're in. hold onto the light that you have, and pray, pray for Jesus to come to your life right now, to make it lighter, to be carried with him. through his perfect love.
to put down those scissors, and stop your chopping.

it's when we surrender to him, we know how mighty we are for him.

Lots of love
Chloe

Never lone.

Hi there team.
How are you?
I hope on this winter bright day you're going well.

I want to talk to you today, about never being alone.

We aren't marooned on an island, left to our own devices.
though some times it might seem like it.

I have recently, being praying for my friends and I'm coming out of hiding.
I used to hide a lot, I had lots of feelings about things, and like a frightened child. I would just hide.

But I'm coming out of hiding, and slowly like a frozen flower defrosting, into the person that the lord has made me to be.


We need to trust Jesus, with everything we do.

We are at his beckon call.

And indeed Jesus when you see him in all his glory  is beautiful.

And sometimes we take that for granted, and sometimes we do need to come into an alighnment, with him.

A practical way of this was when I was coming back from holiday very recently, after meeting such lovely gentle people. from mid Canterbury.

And I was going through Oamaru, after being in Fairlie, helping out at a rest home, and I was going through and I was praying about going into see my nana or just driving past, hoping to make it up sometime this week to Moeraki where she lives.

I was praying about weather to stop in, or just keep driving as I asked my brother to book me in to the gym for the 6 pm class, I was already running late after stopping in Timaru.

so I commited it to prayer, and the lord said Chloe, you need to see her, she's in need of company.

So I turned off, into her drive way, and visited her for a time. and it was lovely to see her, I helped her out with her phone, and got my water bottle filled up she rang my cousin, and she came over, and then I headed away.
The lord blessed me so much I made it back by 4 pm, and off to the gym at 6 pm.

I am finding that, when we commit our ways to Christ, everything works.

So no matter, what you're doing today, if you're in that struggle, and your wondering why, that so many people depend on you to get your through.

It's because we need each other, and paving the way a bridge so to speak, to the next step in life.

We come to a place of complete surrender, when we surrender all of our needs to him, that he sees it, and he does work out things for our good.

So if that's you today, and you're feeling jaded, perhaps, to much pressure, on you.
Take a step back, commit it to prayer, and watch it all fall into place, because when it works it's beautiful.
That's my thoughts for today.
Take care and God bless you.

Chloe

Be active in your waiting.

Hello there lovelies.
I hope that you're having a really nice, day.
Again it's wet, and we have snow on the mountains.

Today I want to encourage you to be active in your waiting.

It's in those times, that we grow, and we devalop love and trust.


I was writing a letter to my lovely little Grace, who is 5 and indonesia is going through a really tough time.
Poor little Grace will be scared.
I wanted to tell her that not to be scared, but my letter I hope was full of hope.

We do need grace, we keep failing, we rise again.

I am urging you to be actively praying, and really pray, not just say it.

Joy still comes in the morning, hope still walks with the hurting.

We need to grow in the word of lord, we all need him to show us the way.

And have open communication. with each other, no one is going to shut you down, or out, they will hear you.

For a long time, I was frozen with fear. and the lord has given me dreams and dreams again, that I was trapped with ice, it was me, trapped in the fear.
Until he came and breathed on me and set me free.

Now I want to encourage you, because we can be  all need encouragement.

Sometimes, that we think the lord is slow in answering our prayers.
as we understand slowness, but Jesus answers prayers, fast, and quickly.

Well the sunshine is coming through, the clouds after a week of rain.
May I just encourage you that it might be raining in your heart, but the rain, cleanses, you and helps things to go.
Lots of love
Chloe

how do you see yourself?

Hello there my friends.
How are you going?

I hope that you're having a really nice time.
I'm on holiday at the moment, so I'm going to do a bit of book planning, and wanting to get an illustrator for my stories.

So my question is, how do you see yourself?

I was with friends as we went all out together to life group the other night, we had a meal out before we went to my friends place.

And the lord in the middle of the meal, came to me, and said ''Chloe I want you to see yourself as I see you.''

And then at the meeting a word came to my friends, that I should come out of ''hiding''.

The week before that, I heard a sermon about the Shuminite  women who came out of her hiding, and made way for Elijah, and was hospitable to him every time he was in her part of the country.
 
Elijah asked her what could be done, because she was so hospitable,   and she had no children.

So the lord blessed her with a son, but the son was out with his father, and complained about a headache, and was taken back to his mother.

She laid him on Elijah bed, and went to see him.

Now she said when asked if everything is all right, she said yes everything will be alright.

And then she explained the her son has died, and is laying on Elijah's bed.

So what can we get from this story of heart ache, but yet joy?

Is that that in our own lives everything happens for a reason?

That our own lives are filled with joy and love yet with such twists and turns that we ourselves can't understand?

Is it that it's time to come out of hiding ourselves to says to Jesus, ''Ok Lord you have me?"

Even when you're family think you're crazy? even when everything might not make sense or things seem like a struggle at the moment.

Maybe for you, the struggle is long, may for you, it feels like there's no rest, maybe for you, you just want someone to care and you just can't take care in.

Maybe for you, you're walk is lonely, and you cry out to God, with all you have like Hannah praying for a son, and when she had Samuel, she handed him back to God.

What are you doing today that is blocking you from coming to God.

How does he see you?

Like that meal out with friends, I finally got it, Jesus was out with us.
 he's everywhere we go.

And that is why we need to be a light to people, a way maker for people, to take our lamps, and not hide them under our beds, but to shine brightly like a city on a hill.

Where does God have you now?

Ask him where is he in the room, and ask him what is he wearing, and how is he speaking to you? right now personally for you?

You might not have many friends, but the ones you do have, take courage because they are there for a reason.

And God will give you many more friends, to be with.

Be it you feel like a stick, in winter, or flourishing tree, you are planted for a reason.

You are here for a reason. you are born for a reason, you have a dist-any for a reason.
You are here.


We need also to make sure that we don't crowd out Jesus, in our work place.

that we make him welcome wherever we go.


Faith is like a muscle we have to exercise it to make us strong.

And the Lord will give us the strength to make us strong for him.

Don't count God out just yet, give him a chance to show up at your work place.
 and in your life.

It's taken me a long time to get to this far, in my own life. I didn't like myself for a long time. I didn't trust any of my family, I didn't trust any guy friends, that wanted to be friends with me. I was like a horse the bolted, and the Lord came, and healed that.

He had to get me into a place of brokenness so that I can see him in all my life.

I was seeing myself as a dead tree a good for nothing, soon to be burned up in the fire tree.

Then the lord put his breath on me, and I started to grow, that all the things that I had done to me,weren't the case.

That I was chosen by him, to do work for him. and now I work for God.

He has made my path straight, and curves nice and even and not sharp, but I had to be in that place of brokenness for myself.

so to all those people out there that think that you're passed it, you have nothing good to offer. 

Take a closer look, and search within yourself, and get the breath of lord over your life, and he will help you heal.

It's time to stop bolting like a race horse and take a slower aproach to God.

Many blessings.

Chloe

 

Hang on

Hello there my friends.
How are you?
I hope that you're having a really nice day.
I hope that you're having a good day.

Today I want to share with you, about hanging on, when things get tough.

When all of sudden you're finding out, things for yourself, that you're suddenly not as strong as you think you are.

It's not a weakness, rather, it's a strength.

In it's those strong moments, that we draw on God's strength, and his love in our lives.

In this world we have so many voices on what we should be.
And what advice to take, rather than have open minds.

It's only now, that I'm learning things, for myself. it's in these times, of strength that I go to God, and I look at grace.

See when we are in the fog and we can't see our way, we need God's light on our lives.
Running away from ourselves we run into chaos, and turmoil.

We just need to stop shouting, to be heard. raising our voices, doesn't do anything. rather it just adds to the stress.

So hanging on, to what you have is precious, and be the garden of your soul, and not let everyone in to see it.

Rejection is really hard, especially when you're in your 30's your not young anymore. it seems really hard to see the sunlight come in the cracks of a shattered yet hopeful heart.

When all you see is noise, and you're wanting peace.

I go to the bible, and I read about how Jesus comforts us, and longs to hold our brokeness. the secret tears of our past, in presesnt.
That we long to close the door, on it. and try not to cry.

That it's ok, to be not ok, when hope comes calling.

Hope still walks with the hurting.

Lots of love
Chloe

Being strong in who you are.

Hello there my friends.
How are you?
I hope that you're good and happy.

I've been thinking a lot about commitments and how comitted we really are.

I've also been hanging out with a lovely friend of mine, and we made about 80 Chinese dumplings, together from scratch. Making the dumpling dough, and filling. these ones are pork and prawn with cabbage.
I've also wrote a letter to my Gracie, my sponsored child I write to once every 2 weeks.
I'm also on the hunt to sponsor a boy, from El Salvador.

I have also begun therapy for myself, as well. so facing the past, getting that over, and moving on.

I have also made brownie today, and will freeze a bit, for my brother Matthew, who is still up in Auckland, seeing his friends, as he went up there for a job interview, but now looks like he'll be home. which will be good.
I can give him his ginger bread man, and some brownie I will freeze for him and some of my 80 dumplings, that I made today.


I have also booked in a horse riding lesson, back at my old riding school, I'll be Chontelle, or Wilson. but that's not until the 3rd of next month.
I am also away, next weekend at my best friends Baby shower.

I'm also starting to plan a bit more, for the boys at the school and what they like and don't like, and what to make for them.
Once a week, I'm making soup and scones for them. for morning tea, I do it for the teachers, but now the boys are getting some as well.
they love hot soup on cold days, and it makes me happy to see boys happy.
They will eat anything, that is going which I'm happy about.

The staff are what I call ''Putting in their orders, for morning teas.'' they do pay for it, and I do like to keep them happy, it's apparently the high light of their day, is morning tea, and what are they getting.
The school is using me, for to a bit of in house catering as well.

So this week the staff will be getting, corn chowder, and small seafood pies. I am wanting to make them like the Fairlie, with their sea food pies.
with thickner of potatoes in them, shrimp and smoked salmon and a bit of fennel would be nice.
I'm always thinking of the princepal, and I think not that it puts the fear of God in me, but I  think help he's brave eating my stuff. There's also 2 very foodie up with the play teachers in there as well, so I need to be in with the right mix.

I'm finding that I am asking lots more questions in the day, what can I improve on and it's listening and doing, cleaning and multitasking all at once.
Along with making sure the boys get enough.

so it might sound a lot, but I throughly enjoy what I do, and each time somone asks if I'm enjoying, I can now say I'm in my ellement.
I can research my things, and go for it.

I am wanting the boys to have lava cakes, which is a bakels packet mix, but I think that the boys would love them.
I know if I was a kid, I'd love lava cake thursday, so far it's muffin friday, as one boy requested muffins, so I've made banana choc chip, and blueberry choc chip muffins, I'm wanting to make a orange choc chip, with real oranges.

Again sticking to the no banana rule, but I thought, that it would be something that their mothers would have made.

The boys like anything Lemony, and tangy, so I'm trying to steer away from the chocolate, although the first thing I will be baking tomorrow will be the famous mud cake recipe.

So when I bake, I think of the kids I'm sponsoring, and I think of dear Gracie, and I wonder if she's happy, as I wish you could see a photo of her, she's the sweetest little girl ever.
 I would love to go over and visit her one day.
 Grace is too small to write the letters so her mum writes them for her.
 I'd love to know where abouts in Indonesia she lives and go over. perhaps thats something I can work on.
In the summer holidays, which are the longest holidays.
I am fortunate to have a job where I do get holidays, that's why I went to work at a school, and next weekend, I am free and on holiday.

 Which I plan to plan out my book, a bit more. and stick to it.

So that's really about it, I am learning through my therapy, that everything is ok, and will be ok. and processing our thoughts, one thing is, I am a fast reacter, always has been. and I don't often slow down and think things through.
 If I was a horse I would be a sport horse, rather than a station hack. Matt would be a pacer, and I would be a galloper.

Reply now, and wait later, that's me.

it's how I'm wired. which has it's ups and downs, and it's fustrations. because I am always feeling like I'm wearing blinkers, and missing things in life, because I'm galloping away thinking to get to the next thing as fast as I can.

Which is why I'm going to therapy, to control this, and process it's ok to slow down.

The horse has already bolted and I'm away with it. trying to bring it under control.

Some people might think it's over compensating making up for lost time, but when your in the thick of it, you don't have a time to think.
you just go in this bolting horse and hold on.

It also has it's down falls, because, you often miss the details in life, because you are so task orreitnated, to get to the next thing, you miss the vital signs.

One of my vital signs, are working with horses, because that is when you have a horse, that you work with, and it's in tune with you, you can't be in another space, it's just you and the horse.
It's always waiting for your next command. it's in no hurry to get to the next thing as it's taking a leaf out of your book.

You need to know yourself, before you work with horses, they bring out the best in you. when you see rider and horse working together it's an art, and it's beautiful.

There's just something about horses, that makes me fully relax.
it doesn't matter if it's a horse that has just come out of the track, or it's the sweet Chontelle, who is an angel. no horse is similar.
they all have their qurks, and that is what I love about them.

I set myself a goal to horse ride, as I've never done it, but I now know a little, more, each time I ride, and ask the horse to do something. when you work as team together, you really are a team, and you trust that horse, and you trust yourself.
That your horse always has your back.

It has done a lot for me over the year, to go riding. I have been in places, where I wasn't happy, that  jobs were just jobs, or jobs haven't been right.

But never look back always forwards, and think that was then this is now.
I am in a job where people depend and trust me to know what I'm doing.
I don't always get feed back on my baking, but I get pleasure of doing it.
It's when you serve people, and you find it effortless to do so, you are in the right job.

And surround yourself with good people, don't surround yourself with just ''takers'' because they will let your goodness for granted, and it hurts the heart of God, to just be focused on yourself all the time.

Jesus came for the lost, for the people least of us, for us, because he saw that we need salvation.

So no matter if we're in the storms of life or at a cross roads, we know, that we have the will of God in our lives.
That our struggles for ourselves are real, my struggle for me is real every day, I think man I'd love to be that or do that, or be married. But for me now, right now, it's to know the will of God, go after it for all we have, and be in him, beacause if we are outside of him, we are like the tossing of the waves we don't know our own mind, we're here there and everywhere, and we don't know ourselves.
God knows, and he knows, what we can take, and can't take.
That's me for today.
Chloe

Coming clean.

Hello dear friends,

How are you?
I have had a good day at work, everything went to plan, and I left early.
I like to have a plan, and not be there to much over time.
Tonight they are feeding part of dad's school, St Hida's for dinner, so it's all on.

It's not a competition,but we strive to do the best we can.

So now I'm listening to my favourite  speaker, which I thing will help cleanse my mind.

I don't know about you, but we all work people, who are different to me.

And I'll share with you one comment, when we talking around the brunch table.

We were talking about children, and where we come in the pecking order, I said that I'm in the middle, and quite proud of my brothers, both are quite successful.

And without batting an eye lid, someone once said, ''oh the middle child is often forgotten about.'' the forgotten child.''

I had to just bite my tongue, and just look down at my empty plate.

I had  had enough about in a sarcastic way, of ''being special'' and this was it.
I mentally thought that we're in a battle here.

Now that person, might not know the offense, I have learn my lesson on not being a tattle tattler, because that does more harm that good.

I put on my armor of God, and battled.

I am thankful for the person  who helps me, but little by little, I thought help whatever I have in my life I have to guard it.

And not to be so friendly, and just be careful.

It takes only 5 seconds for someone, to make impression of you.

Clearly this person thought I was ''special'' but not in a way I think I'm special.

I am starting my psychology appointments soon, this is new for me.
so that I can process things and move on for the better.

When I came out of hospital, I had to have a wellness plan, it impressed me, that I'm still doing things that I wanted to do.
somethings I haven't done.

Somethings, the lock down stopped for a while but I got back on the horse physically.  and it felt so good.

I really recommend if you suffer from anything  get out on a horse, and ride.

I am nothing without a horse, there is something that goes on between rider, and horse when you start to work.

And next time I'm called ''specail.'' I will think of Wilson or Chantalle, the horses  I ride, and I think yes I am special on a horse.

So whatever you're doing or going. you might think you're going backwards, but today as I dropped my friend up at the place where she works, as she started work today, at the hospital I was in for 2 weeks. I felt strange sense of peace.
As we walked passed the entrance, I prayed for the people in there.
I did think about going in to visit the nurses, but I felt as though God has closed the doors, and that was a point of me moving on.

So no matter if you're having doors, slightly open, closed, or partly open.

May I just say a word of wisdom, guard whatever you have, with your heart and head.
Because what you have, is very special, like a rare jewel inside of you.

That you are always watched by Jesus not in a creepy way, but in a way that will challenge you, and accept you for who you are.

See when a jeweler finds a precious jewel, he puts it on black velvet so that the lights in his shop, can catch the light of the jewel, and the true worth is seen.

That might be you, you might be on ''show'' all the time, people, children, everything you do, is seen and measured.

It is tiring, to be on show, but if we do it for the right reasons everything is going to plan.
Lots of love
Chloe

Be thankful for the small things.

Hello there my friends.
I hope that you're good.

Today is my last day of work before I have 2 days off.
I am not at the gym this morning, I'm calling it a rest and recovery day.

That, and mopping that dinning hall is a work out it's self.

I laugh at what dad says, ''what did the last slave die of.'' while I watch the boys have their dinner.

Slowly, I'm getting, feed back of what the boys like and don't like.
No more banana cake.

Not that there's nothing wrong with banana cake, they've just requested no more banana cake.

It used to be a weekly thing, but no more banana cake.

The thing is with my job, is that you have to change it up a bit.

And that's the exciting thing about the job.

A while a go, I wrote about Grace, my sponsored child, she's only 4, and 2 young to write letters, but her mum took the time to write.
which made my day as I came home from mopping the floors.

I've been listening to  a speaker, about how we can change the world.

For grace, and her family the cycle of poverty is broken.

In her letter her mum wrote, something really touching, ''may Jesus bless you forever.'' and that's a words of Grace's mother.

It was there and then, I thanked God quietly, that for one family, and for Grace, she will be raised in a good family, of love, that Jesus has hope for her and her family.

So now I'm wanting more kids to sponsor, my friend has 8 children.

I'm wanting another one. but I will listen to God about what to do next.

Jesus said to be thankful in all things, when he healed the 10 leapers, only one came back to thank him.

Thankfulness comes from the heart, and it goes along way.

So have a look at what you have, and look at what you can share.

It is better to give than recieve,

And that's my thoughts for today.

Beautiful thigns in the morning.

Hello friend,
How's life going?
I hope that you're good and happy.

I woke up to a glorious sunrise, and I thought today is a good day to be alive.

That and I'm learning how to plan more effectively in my work, so I'm not there  over to much over time.

And we are salt and light in our, work places.

I'm starting therapy soon, I have my first psychology appointment next friday.

And again I'm learning how to plan, not for plan for the meetings, but a way to move forward.
And it got me thinking about the times we feel like we're stuck in places we don't want to be there for a long time.

Due to Covid 19 there are many people without jobs, and we are expected to have another wave come our way.

This isn't a time to complain about your job, rather thank God for the job we have.

We are called to give an answer to everything we've come our way.

Jesus doesn't ever stop giving out good things to us he is always working for us, even thought we don't feel it.

It's when the times get tough, we look inward on ourselves, and throw a pity party.
And no one is coming.

This was me, for a long time, I was what you call''the fair police'' You might laugh at it, but my parents, had a time of me voicing my opinions, the thing is, they did so much for me, behind the scenes, for my benefit.

And that is Jesus, in our lives, he's working behind the scenes, for our good.

The thing is, we are to busy, to hear from him, and hear what he has to say.

And we get lost.

Jesus is so above our thoughts,  that we have a partnership with him.
Well it's time for me, to go to the gym.
Lots of love
Chloe