complete and utter mess.

Hello

Well the sunshine is out, and the washing is drying on the line, and the city is bright and clear, and it didn't freeze over night.

Today  I want to share with you, something that is close to me.
 Because we know we don't struggle alone.

And as I write this, I am in my Pjs, listening to some west life.

I'll get going eventually.

I've found out, that I'm enjoying my life, right now. I am.

I was talking to a friend, who is still very close to me, and she said that other friends don't ring, her, I do. there's something about hearing someone's voice on the end of the phone, but I do get it, because she's getting married, and to us single people, we sort of think that there's a new life about to start, so we stay away.

I'm also going for a new job,  as a baker and hopefully using my skills, that I learn t last year.

We are also opening up a new business, in town, so that has added, extra stress but also blessings.

Sometimes we need to believe ourselves that we need to do it, not proving to anyone, because that gets us no where.

if you're always proving, to someone you'll never really get there, because the bar will be always set to high.

At the gym, how do we train? do we go all in, and then stop?

lets face it, we convince ourselves that we don't need  to go,  but when we go, we come out amazing, because we've given our bodies the freedom to exercise, and we know if we're all venting up inside, like a volcano, inside, something is about to give.

We all need those stable friends in our lives, that look out for us,  and sometimes yes it means going to councilling, just to make sure we're not lossing our minds.

What I say, what I write, how I work, isn't easy, inface it's really hard for people, to understand. I say things out loud which are my thoughts,  then if I see someone who's down, well they need to be fixed,  I'm completly, Mad, and infact, yes truth be told I'm unstable in my thoughts.

And if people get in on that, they make it so much bigger than it is, and I'm all caught up in it, the latest one is me being called an count of some description, that I'm coming back to save the people out of work.

That messes with me, so much because I really want to. as you can see I take things very literally, which is funny to the person, but extremely dangerous for me.
My nature is a bit like a basset hound, others can see that I'm getting pushed around but my basset hound nature just sits down and takes it.



Because normal people live normal lives and they can pick up what is, and what isn't.

And here's me trying to make sense out of it all,  I want to make everything better, but I know full well, I can't always wave a magic wand over that person and fix it all.

So my readers, I haven't been this honest for a while, but these are the things that I am going through right now. and if you're going through something totally similar, you'll make it out the other end alive.

God will never give up on you, my friend, he will never let you go.


Off for a run.

C