Something I need

Hi there,
How are you?
I hope that you're going well,
Tonight I want to talk to you about, love/
Haha, it's not because I don't feel unloved, it's because it's on my mind all the time.
Love can be hard at times, it's hard even to navagate through your daily life.
How do we love those around us, that don't see our way of things?
What happens if sometimes our mouths get the best of us?
What happens, when we just leave the door closed and not open it to other people?
We live in such a hungry, pop culture world, that we're just wanting time in  the sun,
That sometimes we walk in shadows.
I'm not wanting to be the next Joyce Meyer, but I just want to get somethings off my mind.
Love is hard at times, it's hard to see some one that you would give everything up for, to be nearer to you, or to be healed, or helped or, perhaps they've closed off that, and you're trying to make it new again.
What happens then?
What is happening now?
Do we just break the trust, break all that hopes that we have  and say to God, ''Well God, that didn't work what do you have in store for me now?

Sometimes you get can take all the advice in the world, but it has to be from the heart.
I was once walking along the beach wtih my frined, and we were talking about trips, that we could do, and all of sudden, my friend said,  "Chloe how come you can't keep guy friends?
I don't know what happend, but somewhere in my heart, something just broke, it felt like a emotional river, just flooded and broke it's banks, inside of me.

and I have to say, it is hard, to love, because people do have partners, at work, and when you do heaps of weddings, there's one every saturday at larnach castle, until the end of April.
And I can't help but think to my self about my friend.
Now I have to say this, I haven't had boyfriends, or even one.
so it was a very sweeping statement, it's a matter between me and God.
God knows because he made me, and I'm not looking at any particular thing or person, to help fillfull that other half as they say now.
I know it sounds brash, but I'm not.
So what is your ''something I need.''
What are you looking for in God, or praying about, or just asking him to do in your life.
Do you see it as a closed door, or a door only with one, handle and that handle is on the other side of the door where God is, and only he can open it?
Are you looking for the wrong thing at the wrong time?
It's not a matter of holding on, but letting go, letting go and trust God what you need, and when you need it, because he knows the right time to give it to you.
And the more you speak to him the more you know more about him, and the way he works, and the way you understand him, the more he understands you.
He's always there, always there in your darkest of nights, through the fearsome storms, wondering if you're going to get to the other side.
Wondering if you're going to reach the other side, all in one piece.
No matter what you're going through, or how lonely your walk is, keep walking, keep the faith, keep that ''something I need.'' Tell God.
Tell him that you need more trust worthy friends,  who stick beside, you, who don't back down at the last minute.
Tell him you need a change of direction, or how you're going with your walk with him.
Is it a run? a walk? or perhaps just a slow steedy slog, if it feels like a slog, perhaps you need to change a few things, and get real with him.
On your knees, yes on your knees at night and really ask him to help you with what ever it is. ask him and he will be there.
He never leaves you to your own devices, or own schemes, because one day they will fail.
Tell him what you need from him and all will be ok, made right, and new every morning.
Chloe